lost in translation.

I just realized that I didn't watch "It's the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown" this Thanksgiving. I've never missed it before...my childhood is dying. :(

where the road meets the sun.

It's Thanksgiving, and man, my house smells like what I imagine Heaven will smell like. My grandparents, parents, sister, and a cousin are sitting in my living room right now, and I have been slowly realizing that there is no place I'd rather be. I love my home, my family, our traditions, and the little tweaks and quirks that sometimes get on each others' nerves but more often make each other smile. This holiday truly is about family, and togetherness, and thankfulness, and that has been something I've really needed lately. I've been struggling with some things, but this holiday season is just what it will take for me to let it all go and just let myself be blessed by what those closest to me have to give.

So, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go be a part of the family time that is happening in my living room. :)

life ain't always beautiful.

These past couple of months, I've had to make some hard decisions.

Do I quit volleyball?

Do I continue to put on a happy face around a certain someone and pretend like their habits don't annoy me beyond belief?

Do I let people take advantage of me because I can always be counted on to do my homework?

Do I give in to the things i have been working so hard on to avoid?

Do I let myself fall back into the destructive grip of jealousy?

Do I attempt to salvage the scrap of faith in God I have left?

My answers have been simple, but not easily attainable.

Yes, I am quitting volleyball. It is not something that is right for me at this time in my life and although it is sad, I hope my teammates respect that and realize that I'm not changing my mind.

No, I will not pretend or be fake. I'm going to start distancing myself from this person, because it can only get nasty.

No, I refuse to be walked all over. My classmates need to grow up and take responsibility for their own actions. I work way too hard to let others get the credit.

No, I will stay strong and look at the big picture. This fleeting happiness here doesn't last, but looking back and seeing how long I've gone without giving in to temptation will be so incredibly rewarding.

No, I will constantly remind myself that "Comparison is the thief of joy." I've finally gotten to a place where I am okay with who I am, and I'm not going to throw that all away.

Yes, I need to make a conscious effort to repair my relationship with the Lord. In fact, I feel like I need to start all over. I'm going back to the basics: Lord, I recognize that I need You, and that whatever I'm doing on my own is not working.

11/15/10.

I just want to completely erase this day from existence.
I am so embarrassed.

i've become one of them.

...one of those girls.
you know, the ones who are obsessed with a certain someone named Justin Bieber.
Take a look at my playlist, and then listen to alllllll the songs on it. Every last one of them.
You'll be hooked too! :)